How to revive the marriage you’re both killing

My husband and I recently found ourselves on the brink of marriage failure. While clawing our way back to each, other we encountered the single best piece of marital advice we’ve ever heard — “Give each other your first and your best.” Actually, for us, it’s the only advice to ever ring true, right, and doable … More How to revive the marriage you’re both killing

The surprising way my husband views me sharing our marriage story—especially his infidelity—with the whole world

Once in a while, someone asks me how Mr. Utter Imperfection feels about me writing and sharing our marriage story, especially his infidelity, so publicly. And I love that. I adore it when someone thinks of him, too. Because very few people wondered after my husband’s well-being like they did mine when our story first … More The surprising way my husband views me sharing our marriage story—especially his infidelity—with the whole world

Healing from trauma is always an inside job—one that takes a lot of help from the outside.

We have to fight for healing. The battle to recover from any kind of trauma is fought one breath, one minute, one half-step onward and upward at a time. While it’s true healing is always and only ever an inside job, we can’t do it without help from the outside. On that note, here are … More Healing from trauma is always an inside job—one that takes a lot of help from the outside.

A spouse’s confession of an affair is often heard like this—”Honey, I shrunk the self-confidence and sense of worth you once had!”

The messages in my inbox detailing the way people struggle to love themselves after being betrayed, flay my heart and summon the bile up from my gut. I alternately fume and lament, weep and rage on behalf of all who’ve been made to feel unworthy of a safe and protected love. All whose self-confidence has … More A spouse’s confession of an affair is often heard like this—”Honey, I shrunk the self-confidence and sense of worth you once had!”

She gets some grace, and he gets some grace, and they get some grace too! Sorry though, there’s just no grace left over for you.

Got grace? … More She gets some grace, and he gets some grace, and they get some grace too! Sorry though, there’s just no grace left over for you.