Utter Imperfection - how to stop trying to buy happiness

Embracing an entire year of no personal spending—what that goal entails along with the why and the how

July 10, 2019

I don’t usually make resolutions, but it’s been an unusual few years for me and my marriage. Three wack years that rendered me resolved to quit using alcohol as a crutch to hobble through life on. And to stop trying to buy happiness, worthiness, and other good feels. Because traditionally, whenever I try to curb my drinking, … More Embracing an entire year of no personal spending—what that goal entails along with the why and the how

Healing from trauma is always an inside job—one that takes a lot of help from the outside.

May 18, 2019

We have to fight for healing. The battle to recover from any kind of trauma is fought one breath, one minute, one half-step onward and upward at a time. While it’s true healing is always and only ever an inside job, we can’t do it without help from the outside. On that note, here are … More Healing from trauma is always an inside job—one that takes a lot of help from the outside.

A spouse’s confession of an affair is often heard like this—”Honey, I shrunk the self-confidence and sense of worth you once had!”

May 6, 2019

The messages in my inbox detailing the way people struggle to love themselves after being betrayed, flay my heart and summon the bile up from my gut. I alternately fume and lament, weep and rage on behalf of all who’ve been made to feel unworthy of a safe and protected love. All whose self-confidence has … More A spouse’s confession of an affair is often heard like this—”Honey, I shrunk the self-confidence and sense of worth you once had!”

To my sister-in-arms who can barely breathe after the betrayal—your lungs will recover, your heart will heal.

April 15, 2019

When I was a teenager, I nearly died in a tent fire at a family reunion. The flames from an overturned old-school propane lantern erupted near the door and melted the zipper shut, sealing me and three other family members inside. Luckily, family members outside our burning tent were able to rip it apart and … More To my sister-in-arms who can barely breathe after the betrayal—your lungs will recover, your heart will heal.