Why Attempting to Rebuild Your Marriage After an Affair is a Colossal Show of Courage

You won’t see it coming, the affair. It’ll blindside you, bring you to your knees, and leave you feeling like you’ll never recover from it. Getting up and moving forward, in whichever direction you choose, will be one of the hardest things you ever attempt to do. So incredibly hard, you’ll think it impossible. At least that’s how it was when it happened to me.

But move forward I did, and so will you. By taking one breath, and then another. By putting one foot in front of the other. First, though, there’s gonna be more body-wracking sobbing than you’ll think you can withstand and a whole lotta hollering out to your god.

When you’re ready, you’ll make your decision and you’ll begin to see it through. And whether you stay or whether you go, either way, it’ll be one of the biggest acts of courage you’ve ever mustered.


And you’ll feel so incredibly alone in all of it. It’s the shame-fueled silence you’ll feel shackled to that will allow the loneliness to descend and take hold. Don’t let it. Don’t be fooled by shame or ruled by silence. Because you won’t be alone in your story of infidelity, I’ll be right there with you. To read my story published by Her View From Home, please click here.


9 thoughts on “Why Attempting to Rebuild Your Marriage After an Affair is a Colossal Show of Courage

  1. Thank you for this!!! My blog should be beginning soon. Plan to set it up this coming week. But wanted to give you a praise report!! My journey in courage has paid off recently – probation finally allowed my husband to come home!!
    It will be a hard time still, I know, to make our marriage what it should be, but we are so much closer and better equipped with him home!! Praise God with me!!


    1. Janice, I’m over the moon to hear about your new blog. And I wish you peace and big love as you endeavor to repair and rebuild your marriage. You deserve nothing less than respect and kindness and I hope you’re being given both in spades.


  2. “Don’t be fooled by shame and ruled by silence” so so powerful. This is beautifully written. Right to the heart.


    1. The hardest thing, hands down, I’ve ever endeavored at. I’ll take your clap, Nina. But I’m still not done with the doing of this yet. It’s a long slow road and the setbacks are frequent. But…there is beauty and joy and love on the road forward too. It’s both things at once, as ever and always.


      Liked by 1 person

      1. I can only imagine as I’ve not been in your shoes. But I’ve done hard things and I know where there’s a will there’s a way. No matter what it is. Love to you my friend.


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